Mimis struggle – Chapter Six
Mimi’s diaper felt uncomfortably heavy, and every step she took reminded her of that fact. She was also acutely aware that everyone they passed knew what she had done, since she couldn’t help but walk funny and was giving off an obvious smell. The people in the store had certainly been aware. Almost as soon as she had finished pooping herself her mother had said loud and clearly: “See, aren’t you glad I made you wear a diaper right now? It’s a good thing I didn’t let you wear a pull-up!” It was her own fault she supposed; her tears were bringing all the attention. After all, only babies cried when they needed a diaper change, a fact that her mother had been just as loud to point out.
Mimi wanted nothing more right now than to go home, so she was happy when they left the mall and started heading towards the car. As they got nearer, Mimi could see that Ally was waiting for them. Good, she thought, at least they wouldn’t have to wait around for longer than they needed to. Of course Ally was likely to say something: “Mom! I think Mimi’s had an accident!” was a classic, but in this case she had no opportunity.
“Now Ally, your sister had a little accident in the mall so I don’t want you saying anything.” Her mother said, pre-empting any inquisitiveness.
“I don’t understand mom…” she said innocently, “Are you hurt Mimi?”
“No Ally.” She leaned closer to her daughter so that they could whisper. “She erm, couldn’t control herself and has made a bit of a mess in her diaper.”
“Mom!” Mimi had overheard the whisper and was clearly unhappy at being talked about like a three year old. “It wasn’t my fault…” She added meekly.
“It’s alright sis, you don’t have to make stuff up.”
“Ally, it’d be best if we just left it here.” Their mother interjected.
“Well it’s not like it’s the first time or anything.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about…” Mimi blushed.
“Come on, you wouldn’t be in diapers if… well, if it didn’t happen all the time.”
Her mother was suddenly very interested in what she had to say. Sensing this Mimi had no choice but to defend herself.
“No! It hardly ever happens…”
“I don’t know about that Mimi.” Ally said prodding Mimi’s diaper which was met with a flinch.
“Mom! Ally’s picking on me!”
“Geeze, I was just saying! Better in her… you know, than not.”
“And that’s why she wears diapers Ally, but I don’t want to hear another word out of either of you! Now back in the car girls, we’re going home.”
“Aren’t you gonna change her?”
“I can change myself!” Mimi added defiantly.
“I will change Mimi’s diaper when we get back to the house. Now get into the car, both of you.” And that was the last word spoken before the girls got home.
The change went more or less as Mimi expected, and although she would never admit it, she really wanted it. It wasn’t that a poopy diaper was particularly uncomfortable, she was used to that, but while ever she stayed in it she couldn’t look her sister in the face. Diapers were poor friends to Mimi; they could not keep a secret about what she had done in them.
Embarrassed and still feeling very much dependant, Mimi was left to lament her post-change situation. She had had two accidents in one day, and although she still blamed her mother for the magnitude of the second one, there was no denying it: her control had let her down. There was no way her mother was ever going to let her out of diapers if she kept on like this.
At once Mimi realized that she was going about it totally wrong.
She hated the injustice of being made to wear something she didn’t want to, she hated being told that she was wrong and that someone else knew better. Her diapers were a focus for everything that made her feel sad, inadequate and not free. Mimi had let her pride direct her judgement, thinking ever and always about the diaper itself and not what it represented – a loss of control. It was what happened in the diaper that was important, but she had been so concerned with fighting the principal of it all that it hadn’t mattered; getting out was her only goal. Maybe she needed to think long and hard about what she really wanted…
The solution was actually pretty simple when she thought about it. But then, the most obvious solutions are always right in front of you, blocked by walls of doubt, desperation and pride. Mimi even laughed a little bit, sure in her mind that eventually it had to work. It might take a little time, but in the end there was no way that it could not work, it was just plain logic. However, in order for her new philosophy to be successful at all Mimi needed to cast off her pride, which after such a long period of defiance was going to be hard to do. Worse still she needed to be prepared to lose what little self esteem she had, which would in many ways be the hardest thing of all to do. If she could manage it though, the rewards would surely make it all worth while…
The rewards were suddenly not looking worth while as Mimi laid back for her third diaper change of the day. All had been going well up to a point, with the whole family together in the front room that evening watching a movie. That had been when the usual urge hit. At first Mimi was ready to get up and use the bathroom, when she suddenly remembered her plan; the new way. She had to admit that she had not reckoned on it being such an awkward decision, but still she was determined, so she began to focus on holding on. She remained seated and still as her need quickly grew all the more urgent, all the while her will fading along with it. Thoughts of her new plan not being a good idea were now very prevalent in her mind. Holding on as long as she could until she went in her diaper? What had she been thinking? Sure it would eventually make her control stronger, which is of course what she had been thinking, but it still meant she had to keep using her diaper. Mimi knew that she had been dead set on it not so long ago, and she knew that it would take its toll on her pride, but at that very moment she just didn’t feel ready to go through with it. Maybe in the presence of her whole family wasn’t a good time to ease herself into it. If she was going to quit her mission, it was now or never.
As her wet diaper was being un-taped, Mimi wished that she had chosen not to make a rush for the bathroom. She could handle the final result; so to speak, as it was obviously nothing new to her and the entire success of her plan kind of required it. No, it was the humiliation that came from everyone knowing that she had desperately tried to make it to the bathroom but failed. All the same it was her own fault, if only she had decided to go through with her plan and not bring attention to herself by blundering her way out of the room, or at least if she had decided to abandon her plan a bit earlier she might not have fallen short of the goal and flooded her diaper, forcing her to walk back to her family in shame. Her mother didn’t even ask what had happened, she knew exactly what she needed to do and immediately took Mimi by the hand.
There were no noticeable benefits so far, but then she figured there wouldn’t be right away. If she was in it for the long haul then she would have to accept that it might be weeks, maybe even months before it made a difference to her control. After the embarrassing failure of the very first attempt she suddenly did not like the prospect of weeks of the same. Maybe she should set a time frame for her goals? If she didn’t notice any improvement after two weeks she would quit.
And then there was the small matter of revealing her plan. She knew that if she kept using her diapers for an extended amount of time then Ally was bound to say something, even if her mother didn’t, and there wasn’t a particularly good excuse other than the truth.
No, they would not understand. Her mother was already resigned to the fact that Mimi would probably always need diapers and she was scared that Ally would try and undermine her efforts if she knew. They would probably think that she just wasn’t trying, but what would it matter? She was in diapers all the time anyway so it wasn’t like things could get any worse for Mimi. Things might even get better! She thought, as her mom might get tired of changing diapers if it became a regular thing. She thought about what it would be like to change her own diapers. Probably very tedious she decided, but she could do it whenever she wanted and not be embarrassed when her mom decided it was time. That kind of freedom was worth a little initial doubt.
So as the first of many future diaper changes came to an end, Mimi was resolved to continue with her plan and vowed not to tell anyone about it. On the plus side, she had realized just what good thinking time a diaper change could be!
The End of Mimis Struggle – Chapter Six.
If you want to read more stories about ABDL girls you can find a list here: Diaper Girls – Index